Do you ever choke on your own spit and feel like natural selection is trying to tell you something
(via whatsupstallionduck)
one time i got a sample from the tea store at the mall and as i walked away the guy said “tea you later” and then his coworker smacked him
(via whatsupstallionduck)
Jaromir Jagr, on playing with the Boston Bruins (via loooooch)
(via thatshitkrejci)
They make me even happy when I don’t score. But they making me happy, even when I struggle scoring. They find a way to make me happy. Starting with the coach. That’s what I would say. I don’t think I’d feel that on any other team. It doesn’t really matter if I score or not. He tried to make me [feel] important or happy even if I’m not scoring. That’s the first time I felt that in my hockey career.
knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit
wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad
charisma is convincing someone to do it anyways
(Source: fuckking-crazy, via ii-do-what-i-want)
I majored in gif making.
More like majored in becoming a hot piece of ass
(via the-pilots-wife)
I can only apologise.
This guy just needed a hug forever. And ever. And ever.
(via the-pilots-wife)
She won’t do anything else. I’ve tried to take her outside, she doesn’t like the outdoors so she won’t run around. She doesn’t like cat toys, she doesn’t like catnip. Anything normal that cats like she just doesn’t like. (x)
stop I can’t
(Source: britta-saurus, via the-pilots-wife)
